“If you want to live a life you’ve never lived, you have to do things you’ve never done.”
So far in The HAPPY Series, I have given you a quick introduction to the five tools of happiness and we’ve also talked about the first tool, which is Have Gratitude. If you haven’t read those blog posts yet, feel free to use the links to go check them out at some point.
Today, we’ll be looking at the next tool on the HAPPY list, which is Accept Your Problems. I also like to think of this one as “Let Go”. First and foremost, I want to be clear that when I say, “accept your problems”, I don’t mean give up and quit trying to live a happier life. I’m also not trying to suggest that you just ignore your issues or pretend like they’re not there.
What Does Accepting Your Problems Look Like?
When you Accept Your Problems, you are essentially letting go of the control those issues have over your life. You are admitting that there are things in your life that are not going the way you want them to and you are willing to stop trying to force them to disappear.
Letting go of your problems is an important step to happiness, especially if those issues are completely out of your control. Why worry and stress over something you can’t change anyway? If you’ve spent your whole life trying to fight your issues, try accepting them instead and see if that feels better.
How Do I Do This?
Here are some steps to follow so you can let go of your problems and start to accept them.
Notice & Acknowledge:
The first step in Accepting Your Problems is to acknowledge what is happening in your life that you are unhappy with. A great way to do this is to start paying more attention to your feelings throughout the day. Try to notice when you feel anxious or tense or stressed. Chances are, those feelings are being caused by something in your life that you are not happy with.
Investigate & Reflect:
Once you’ve identified a problem or issue that you want to accept, the next step is to pay attention to how it makes you feel. The goal isn’t to dwell on those negative feelings or to let them overpower you. Instead, you need to get clear on how you DON’T want to feel so you can then focus on how you DO want to feel in the future. This step doesn’t have to take a long time, but it does require a moment of reflection where you are willing to think about the feelings you are experiencing.
Release & Let Go:
Now that you’ve noticed a problem and taken a moment to pay attention to it, the next step is to just let it go. At this point, you are aware of the issue and you know how it makes you feel. You’ve done your due diligence and now it’s time to move on and stop thinking about it. This step is crucial because it allows you to push aside the negative thoughts and feelings and then move on with your day. Obviously, this doesn’t mean that the problem is gone or won’t come back into your awareness. But it does mean that you are no longer focusing on it or letting it bring you down.
Repeat (Over & Over Again):
The last piece of the puzzle is to keep repeating the previous steps. The point of these steps isn’t to make our problems go away completely, but rather to find peace with them and not let them ruin how you feel on a day-to-day basis.
Chances are, you will have the same or similar issues pop up over and over again. This doesn’t mean that you are doing anything wrong or that this exercise isn’t working, it simply shows you how important it is to stay on top of the things that are dragging you down.
Once you’ve been practicing this work for a while, you will start to see how you can automatically go through the steps without even thinking of them. Once you get good at this method, you might need just a few seconds to run through the entire process.
How Does This Help in The Long-Term?
Now that you’ve got some practical steps to follow, you might be wondering how this will help you in the long run. There are many ways that this process can help you feel happier. Here are a few examples:
- Less time and energy spent worrying about your problems
- More head space to think positive thoughts and feel good
- Less stress over things you can’t control
- More awareness of your feelings and stopping bad thoughts before they take over
- Less frustration over your life not looking the way you want it to
- More hope for things to turn around and to ultimately live a happier life
What’s Next?
If you want to take this practice to a whole other level, try journaling about your thoughts before and after running through the steps. How did you feel before you let go of a specific issue? What resistance did you face as you tried to accept the problem? How do you feel now that you’ve let it go? Keeping a log of these situations is a great way to look back and see how far you’ve come. This process is just like working out. The more you do it the stronger you will become. It might feel hard or awkward at first, but it will get easier. I promise!
Stay tuned for the next post in The HAPPY Series where I will be talking about focusing your energy on Positive Vibes. If that sounds like something you’d like to learn more about, sign up for my email list and you will get an email when the next post goes live.
I’ve also created a fun worksheet that gives you an UN-Do List of things to STOP doing in your life to feel happier and more content. It’s in my FREE Resource Library, so sign up today and get access to this worksheet and a bunch of other helpful tools.
I hope you liked this blog post! If you did, feel free to share it with someone else who might like it. And stay tuned for the rest of The HAPPY Series!
Until then, sending all the light & love your way,
Beth ♡
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